I understand how difficult it is for business owners to seek outside assistance. It feels like an acknowledgement of not being up to the task at hand. In addition, outside assistance has a cost factor that seems to require an overly indulgent outlay of resources.

I had been a business owner for 30 years. I remember the feeling that I should have the answers to all the questions my employees, independent contractors, clients, vendors, the janitor, or the whole world brought to me. To not have the answer felt like I wasn't doing my job. And responsible people primarily want to do their job in the best possible manner. We don't have all the answers, yet sometimes we are operating without full disclosure of that fact, especially to ourselves.

Having stepped back from my business for five years and immersed myself in the world of mediation, I now have a new perspective. While I certainly had invested in consulting advice at times in the past, I saw where I, and many I have mediated with, had sometimes been penny-wise and pound-foolish. Instead of being a financial drain, seeking assistance can save and generate resources. In areas where emotions may override our clear thinking, a neutral person can be an investment that results in saving time and money, getting past hurdles, even surfacing new income-producing ideas.

I have now put this expanded perspective into my own practical use. I have since sold my business and no longer have 30 employees, but I still need to manage myself and my practice of mediation. So I engaged a career coach to help me plan my future. Sure, I could have done it myself. But could I have done it as well or as efficiently? This professional taught me how to envision a balance between not enough and too much work, preserving my inner peace. She helped me address the "unthinkable" concept of self-doubt. She inspired the courage to seek strength in my vulnerabilities. I emerged after three months with expanded confidence that may otherwise have taken me years to achieve.

The experience helped me to realize again, on a whole new level, the value of raising and clearing those powerful sensitive issues that can otherwise lurk beneath, draining time, energy, and sleep. They are not unique to any one of us. They are common, human conditions. I asked my coach if everyone had private self-doubt. She said she had never met anyone who did not, except one. And that one person was completely unaware of his obvious shortcomings.

Early dialogue is one of the elements of my mediation, facilitation, and coaching service. When embarking on new business ventures, transitioning business practices, strategizing, managing conflict, or reaching accord within an organization, it is never too early--or too late--to sit down with the parties involved and a trained neutral person. We can sort through the sensitive issues and arrive at your desired outcome or at least a best alternative. Everyone has their own set of issues they find uncomfortable to discuss. And no matter how much we understand this concept, our own sensitivities can cloud our thinking when in the middle of the matter.

Or if you are involved in negotiations, in litigation, a deep conflict, or at one of those stages where your creativity is bursting at the seams, a trained facilitator can coach you privately on finding your finest performance for reaching your best outcome.

Either direction, I am comfortable exploring the world beneath the surface with clients. It is rich and full, yet can be daunting. It is never as difficult as we fear. I can help in reducing the intimidation and raising the richness. I have made more than my share of mistakes and have learned how to be forgiving of myself. I extend that removal of judgment towards the people I work with. This is not therapy. It is simply raising those uncomfortable matters that lie beneath the business surface and discussing them with someone we trust.